It’s probably a good idea that Hollywood gives us a new James Bond every ten years or so. It would be depressing if the ultimate male fantasy life aged like a real person. James Bond would be in a British Secret Service retirement home taking his false teeth out to flirt with the nurses as they lifted him into his wheelchair, and then begging the doctors to give him a new prescription for viagra. A new fresh James Bond makes it fun – showing him bedding beautiful woman after beautiful woman as he foils the complex plot of a super villain out for world domination. He couldn’t pick up girls if he couldn’t go to bed with them without breaking his hip. It seems so easy in the movies, but it’s really not so difficult for those of us who aren’t a super spy to pick up girls.
But how to pick up a girl?
By following our step by step guide, you might not feel like a super spy, but you’ll feel like a super stud…
1. DO THE BEST YOU CAN WITH WHAT YOU’VE GOT
It seems like stating the obvious, but if you really want to know how to pick up a girl, you’re not going to have much luck if you go to your trashy local bar wearing the sweat pants you’ve been sitting in all day. Go to a cool bar and dress up. Your hair needs to be great, your clothes need to be stylish.
Make sure your breath is fresh and that you don’t have any boogers in your nose (it’s seriously important). You will also need to have some cash. If you’re eating stale bread until your next pay day, then don’t go out. You might need to buy yourself drinks for a few hours, and if all goes well, you’ll be buying drinks for girls too.
2. KNOW YOUR LIMITS AND CHOOSE WISELY
There are many beautiful girls when you want to approach them at a party or when you’re working out how to pick up a girl at a bar. Avoid girls with large groups of friends, since you don’t want to have an audience if it doesn’t go so well. A girl who’s alone might be waiting for someone, or she might be wanting to meet someone.
We don’t want to be negative, but if you look like present day Danny DeVito, you might not have any luck with a woman that looks like Sharon Stone circa Basic Instinct. Pick a girl who will be compatible with you in terms of looks.
3. HOW TO PICK UP A GIRL WITHOUT COMING ON TOO STRONG
Don’t be a douche. Sleazy pick up lines can be funny, but they can also make you sound like a creep. If you’re skilled at saying something dirty but still sounding fun, then go for it, but otherwise trying to pick up girls with these lines might have her reaching for her pepper spray. Be blunt, but not a stereotype. “Come here often?” is lame. “I’m bored and you look interesting. Can I sit with you?” is to the point and effective.
We’re not going to lie – it can be nerve wracking when you’re working out how to pick up a girl at a bar. A few drinks can actually help you. That’s a few drinks. Don’t be so drunk that you’re in danger of throwing up. Likewise, don’t choose a girl who is so drunk that she’ll end up puking all over your bed.
4. BE INTERESTING
You’re not interesting? Damn. Go home. No, just kidding… But remember that girls will have multiple suitors in a night, so when you’re working out how to pick up a girl that you need to hold her attention. Ask open ended questions, so “What do you think about this place?” is better than “Do you like this place?”
How much she answers depends on if she likes what she sees, so if you sense her disinterest, make your excuses, wish her a pleasant evening and then move on. Sure, she’s probably going to see you planning how to pick up a girl later in the evening, but who cares? It’s not as though you know her or will even see her again.
5. ENGAGE A WING MAN
If you’re a nervous type and thinking about how to pick up girls makes you want to stay at home, drink cheap wine and binge watch Game of Thrones (where at least you’re guaranteed to see breasts), then engage the services of a buddy. It can be easier to hunt in packs, and having a friend there helps conversation to flow, especially when he can subtly work your interesting points into the chat with a girl.
Choose a buddy that already has a girlfriend, so there’s less chance that she’ll set her sights on him. A married buddy is also good, since she’ll see the ring and won’t seriously consider him, but your best asset is maybe a gay friend. A friendly gay guy puts girls at ease, and her defenses will be down against your charm attack.
6. CLOSING THE DEAL: MY PLACE OR YOURS?
When the conversation goes well, and she seems to like you, then the next part of how to pick up a girl comes to mind. How do you get her back to your place? Be cool, be suave, and just ask her: “I’m gonna head home. Want to come?” or “Want to share a cab?” She might smile and point out that you don’t live close to each other. Just smile and say that that’s not a problem.
When it comes to how to pick up a girl, you can’t always close the deal on the first night, even if you’re actually James Bond. If she says no, get a phone number and arrange for a second meeting… a meeting that will go all night long.